The Blues

It's been three weeks since I've seen my therapist. That isn't good. Know how I know? Cause I'm a wreck!

Couldn't sleep last night. Too many incomplete thoughts running around in my head. I have questions I don't have answers to and I have problems I can't solve. After tossing and turning for what seemed like hours, I got up, went into the bathroom, and cried my eyes out like a little baby. And nobody else in the house knew. It was a painful moment, but I eventually picked myself up off the bathroom floor and went back to bed. At 3:30am.

Trying to take a shower this morning proved harder than I thought. What the heck is going on? It's a simple shower. A SHOWER! Running water, soap, a razor if needed, shampoo, conditioner, and more water. What is the freakin' problem with that? I'm not completely sure. But what I am sure of is that when I got in, all I wanted to do was stand there and cry. As I wiped the tears away, more came. My face was more wet from crying than it was from the shower. The consoling attempt by another didn't help as it usually does. All it made me do was cry more because it created MORE unanswered questions.

I feel lost.