Monday, May 23, 2011

This truly is harder to live by than it seems

For as long as I can remember, this saying has been hanging on a wall in every house I’ve ever lived in. When I experienced my first loss (grandpa), I struggled to understand what the saying meant. When I went through the horrible teenage phase that forced my parents to push me away, I struggled again to understand. When I went through the hardest part of my divorce, I again thought I understood. Later I found out I didn’t. When I lost custody of my son, I forced myself to believe that it was different, yet again, I was wrong.

Today, I’m 32 years old, and I still struggle to fully grasp this important message. Don’t get me wrong, I understand the words. That’s not my problem. My problem…letting go of things that are not in my control.  I can’t control the times in which boss#1 returns a phone call. I can’t control that there will be traffic due to a freeway closure. I can’t control that the transmission broke. And I certainly can’t control how many animals RM#1 will bring home. However, I can control how quickly someone gets back to our client. I can control how annoyed I’ll be at the traffic by turning up the radio. I can control how angry or upset I get about the transmission by having it fixed. And I can control how annoyed I get about all the animals by staying away from the house or hiding out in my bedroom. It’s all in the approach. And right now, my odds are pretty good that it’s all finally starting to sink in. ‘Bout damn time. untitled

2 comments:

  1. It aint an easy thing to do. It has to be turned over to God. Only he can make it easy. And since the world didnt end he is still in the helping business.

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  2. I think it's about time. :-)

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